The jobs a good'un !
The screaming roar of a distressed vehicle's churning engine, in low gear, drew my nosiness to the direction of the racket. It was a small red flat bed truck, loaded with the biggest dog kennel I have ever seen and a set of steps. It was stuck in a muddy sandy puddle, in front of the "Sassenach's" static van. The driver was a woman, a lot of woman. Obviously she had never been stuck in wet sand before but she knew how to handle a truck. She revved and revved but she was going no where. The effect however was spectacular. The sand, mixed with water and top soil fountained into the air spraying the caravan, its lovely new decking and anything within seven foot to the rear of the commotion. It would have made a farmer proud.
Next to join the pandemonium was a little green hatchback. This pulled up about six foot behind the now still flat bed. The doors of the car opened and the tribe of Manasseh spilled out. "These are some poor sods new neighbours", was my first thought. "Oh God, the empty van is next to mine", was the second.
As the tribe organised themselves and started dispensing advice, a leader emerged from the group. A short bald chap with bandy legs. He bundled the lady out of the flatbed and got into the driving seat pointing to the front, and shouting instructions. A small crowd of men was gathering around.
"That's neighbourly", I thought " they have come to lend a hand", but I suspected all eyes, young and old, were fixed on her cleavage, it was spectacular.
Boss Manasseh started up the red devil and proceeded to rev and spin the wheels as before, but this time in reverse. The added extra however was the lady, with strong hands on the bonnet, started to pump it up and down. Nothing much happened. "Go on love you're doin grand!" someone shouted". Another encouraged "Keep going Lass, Put your back into it!" The truck slowly rolled back and everyone cheered. The lass straightened up puffing out her chest wiping her hands on her tight jeans saying, " The jobs a good'un!" as she strode off proudly.
I asked an old chap from the group later on, why he didn't lend a hand, he said," I was having too much fun where I was. It's a while since I've had an eyeful like that!"